17/09/2011

Talk to strangers!

last night i had the best time yet in sydney, all thanks to a stranger!

after finding out as much as i could about alternative nights out here, i was still seriously lacking in someone to go with, so after drinks with the work guys i headed to scary canary, the bar attached to the hostel i’m staying in, where they play the same horrific and generic house shit every night, just like nearly every venue in sydney actually. thankfully i know a few people there, and i’m soon in the smoking area taking in lovely lungfuls of second hand smoke, and chatting to a german friend, from this i get chatting to some lovely swedish girls, then some nice finish girls too. i convince the swedish girls to come check out this club with me, but for some reason these two german guys end up tagging along as well (total cock block!) and when we get there, they totally bail on me :( after a bit of joking around, they still bail… but i clocked a guy with stretchers on the walk up, so heading back that way i find him ‘nice strectchers’ i say. it turns out the guy hasn’t been in sydney long but is staying with his brother, and is from adelaide. anyway, we get on so well, and are talking music all, so when we bounce from the bar they were in i lead them back to the club, only to find out there’s only 70 people in there and it’s $10 to get in… we bounce on, heading for the other night i’d heard of, after losing the brother we find this place, on the gay side of oxford street, wander in and it’s free, thanks to the box office being shut! get in and boom! it’s sweet dubstep and shuffle tunes, so i learn to shuffle and we have a great laugh. so glad i made that step to say hi! especially as i finally have someone up for hitting the cooler places in town with me, someone who has a clue about music! we’d be out tonight, but he’s broke :( so while it’s easy to meet people in the hostel, these guys just ain’t my style ya'know what I'm sayin'?

12/09/2011

A first-timers guide to Australia

First up, know why you're going, is it a holiday, or do you want to work?

If you're doing a holiday, then make sure you book up as much as you can, you don't want any empty days, seriously. You can explore most of the cities in a single day by foot so you'll soon get bored of wandering around if you've got too many days to kill. Book everything from the UK, it gets very expensive very quickly out here, but you'll get a good deal and be able to plan it all nicely with the tour operator in the UK. You need to know what you want to do, but it's all pretty much the same stuff that everyone else does. Bungee Jump and Skydive, Snorkeling at the great barrier reef, Fraser Island and Whitsunday, Sydney attractions, Byron Bay, Bondi Beach... etc just work out what you can afford and do as much as you can. There's about 20 different options and easily 100 operators all selling the same shit, so just go with what your operator suggests. Remember it's a holiday, so make the most of it.

If you're planning to work here then it's a whole different story. I'd recommend not doing any of the suggested intro packages (they're usually pretty shit), but instead book yourself a week or two at a reasonable hostel and prepare for some boring days... Try to fly in on a sunday or monday, so you've got the whole working week to get yourself sorted. There's a lot of stuff you need to get prepared:
Phone - head to Vodaphone, or any of the other shops and get the cheapest you can find
Bank Account - easy enough, make sure you have your phone first though! You can't get paid until you have an aussie bank account.
Tax number - this stops you paying too much tax, there's about 1000 ways to get this, so it shouldn't be too hard.
RSA - This is required if you want bar work, and is a bit pricey, but get it asap.
RCG - This allows you to work somewhere that has gambling, which a lot of bars do, so it's pretty useful
Other qualifications - depending on what sector you want to work in, there's probably a certificate needed, it's a ballache, but if you arrived at a good time you can get it sorted pretty fast.

Once all that is sorted you can start the job hunt, this is also a ballache but remember, the aussie minimum wage is around $20 an hour, so the price of a beer doesn't seem to so bad then! You can save the hassle of getting certificates if you go for farm jobs, or fundraising. Farm jobs are usually miles away, but offer free accomodation and if you do them for 3 months you qualify for a second working visa.
Bear in mind that Australia is expensive! Cheapest beer I've seen is $5 which wasn't even a full pint, and a Big Mac meal is $7, which works out at about £5. So it's expensive, until you start working, then it really seems quite cheap. But when you first get out here, you'll be draining your bank account a lot quicker than you might think - so avoid the expensive stuff until the end of your trip.

Finally, whether on holiday or working, take a friend! It's pretty scary moving cities in the UK, but when you consider that you'll have no-one to go to the pub with, no permanent place to live and no job it's really easy to get homesick. If you are alone, then stick with it, you do meet people and make friends pretty quick, but when you're sleeping in a room full of strangers and running out of money it's pretty lonely.

23/08/2011

sex

Hello to the two people I know that read this...

This post was inspired by a rather rediculous post I saw online, that said "If a man comes during sex it's normal, if a woman comes is exceptional" or something similar, I'm paraphrasing.

I'm sure you know me well enough to know that I disagree! It all comes down to effort, and dominance. Men come because they are the ones putting the greater percentage of effort in, and are in charge of positioning. If a girl wants to enjoy herself more, she must be more active, either putting in as much effort, or changing the position into one which works for her. I know most guys would not complain about this! I only remember being with one girl who was totally assertive, in fact, she was pretty damn pushy as well, insisting she was on top and grinding away in a way that did nothing for me. I was happy to oblige though, knowing that she was enjoying it, and well, things would continue on afterwards.

Perhaps girls should stop worrying about how good the boy is, and work on making it work for them!

Also, what's the deal with the toilet seat thing? Putting the seat down takes practically 0 effort, while lifting it is more work (physically speaking, it's obviously not a big deal) but I've never heard a bloke moaning about have to lift the thing!

I've had a few bits n pieces to write about for a while, but I seem to have forgotten the others...

30/05/2011

Awesome Days 2

Slam Dunk,

Offered tickets on thursday, found someone to go with who sorted us a car to get down and then comes one of the most awesome days! Getting stuck in traffic and having to keep switching the engine off to keep it cool, listening to one chilli peppers song on repeat because it was the only good song in the car, not having to queue at all, free afterparty tickets, sunshine so we can rock the shades, and then so so many bands!

Failsafe - still awesome!
The Famous Class - actually terrible
This Time Last Year - not bad I suppose...
Goldfinger - a very pleasant surprise, but cut short
Bury Tomorrow - still shredding
Lost Boys - great show
While She Sleeps - missed my favourite song, but still loved the set
VersaEmerge - caught a song or two and was impressed, plus super hot singer
Blitz Kids - didn't play my favourite song! But signed by my friends at hassle, good job boys
MC Lars - rammed the smallest room and killed it
Francesqa - kinda boring tbh
Dance Gavin Dance - 3rd time that week and still blew me away in the top 5 bands now
Less Than Jake - great to see them again after so long, and really good to get nostalgic, plenty of awesome old ones from my youth
Deaf Havana - lead was wankered, but still sang great! Seriously impressive response from the crowd, singing it all back
We Are The Ocean - seriously good these days, props to those boys

These aren't in order btw, just the order I remembered them! Missed Lower Than Atlantis, The Skints and The King Blues, but I can live with that.

Ended up buying Far Q by LTA for the drive home and selling our afterparty tickets, pretty sweet really.

Such a good time, and so impressed by the festival. After last years problems getting around they really got smart and sorted it all out. There was no issue getting around, plenty of space for all the merch and food stands, and best of all, the sound quality was amazing in every room! Loved every second!

Awesome Days

i finished uni on tuesday and have had the best fucking time since! tatto, snowboard, london and some of the best shows i’ve seen.
serious props to:

piers for my ghost, rob, scott and tereza for board times and maccies, lucy and maisie for tumblrlols on the ‘snow’, regents park gardeners for the roses, chloe for food, dgd, nasin and sleeps, rob, charlottw, scott g, rudy and matt for acw chilling times, don broco, the dangerous summer, the james cleaver quintet and yashin for music, dance gavin dance for the sickiest shows, particularly jonny craig, matt mingus and eric lodge who chilled with us at nasin, ryan and amar for drinks, and ross for being awesome, nina for posh lunch, elle for the thunder storms and cheap lunch, uxia at dgd(2), the cute merch girl for dgd and the jcq for cheap shirts, mike of lta for being drunk, rhianna for sleeps and good times, leo for posh breakfast and ellie for pint o’ prawns twenty minutes later, and the ifpi for not changing a bit.
and now, party times with the aston snow crew, work with the a&b lads and slam dunk with awesome lost boys!

fucken love my life :d

15/05/2011

Why girls hate guys, and why guys can't be with girls.

Setting aside the whole notion that we're all still too closely related to animals, and therefore are much more prone to wanting several partners, here's why guys don't want to be with girls, and why girls hate them for it:

Girls are boring.

And why is that? Because the majority of girls that I know only do two things: Work and drink. This doesn't interest me. What I look for in a girl is the same as what I look for in a friend (with the exception of attractiveness which is rather more important with girlfriends) which is someone who will excite and inspire me. Someone who will be enthusiastic about the things I enjoy. Someone who will help me to live a more enjoyable life, and to experience new things.

For example, my friend Tim was brilliant, not just because we could play in a band together, or that we could go to the pub until 3 in the morning on a Tuesday just because. But he inspired and taught me new things, he introduced me to Mountain Biking, something I always wanted to try, and thanks to him I did, he taught me how to play Mah Jong (the real version) he introduced me to some amazing music, Behold... The Arctopus and Soulwax mostly as well as taking me to see Roni Size. Thanks to him I experienced so much more.

Ina also helped in many ways, getting me to listen to much more jazz and funk, getting me more involved in the working of computers and gaming more, and teaching me a lot about people.

It's rare that I've met a girl who can inspire or has encouraged me to try new things in such a way, which is a great shame. While I may be arrogant, I am humble enough to know that I do not know everything, and I would like to learn. Whether a girl teaches me how to cook (I really know so few girls that are any better than me!) how to rock climb, or encourages me to do something I've always wanted to do, like a bungie jump or a skydive, it doesn't matter what, but it matters that she would have pushed me to do it.

I'd like a girl to have her own opinions and tastes on things, whether these are similar to mine or not doesn't matter, so long as it's a sincere and passionate belief, and not a shallow formed and ill-informed opinion. I'd like a girl to challenge me as well.

I don't want to be held back, as much as I love a chilled out night in watching films, I don't want that all the time. But I also don't want to organise everything all the time. I need time home alone, out with friends, with a girl and out with a girl. But to organise all this would piss me off. So a girl needs her own life, I don't want to be her life, just a big part of it.

And you know why girls hate guys?

Because they don't want to settle for some boring girl! And we're to blame for that apparently. Guys have been taught as they grow up that in order to get the girl we need to be cool, funny, successful and confident. We're told that we should do things that make us seem cooler, look better and offer a better package to a girl. We're told that we should do all the work to earn a place next to a girl. On top of all that, we do more stuff because we actually want to, it's fun!

What does the girl have to do? Be Pretty. That's all their told. But it's wrong, guys don't want you just because you're pretty. We've worked hard on all the aspects of our lives, we've got it all sorted. So now we can girl the girl, and if we can get you, we can get more. Why should we choose you? What can you offer other than a pretty face?

So, there's a few girls I know that have more than just work and drink in their lives. Some rock-climb, others go to the gym, some snowboard, some surf. But none have ever thought to encourage me.

Maybe I'm just getting the wrong girls, maybe all the good ones are taken. Maybe I just need to meet more people and this is a horrifically incorrect sweeping statement. But please, if you're a girl and you do more than just drink and work, please let me know! Then give me your number.

Advice to Bands

This is some advice I sent in an email out to a guy whose son I saw play on Friday night:

" Before going on stage send one member to speak to the soundman, and tell him that you're about to go on, and that you'll put a thumbs up once you're all ready to play. Then, all walk on stage, quickly check everything is working - and I mean very quickly, one quick strum of a guitar and tapping the mic is enough - do not play anything else! Once you know everything is working fine, put the thumbs up and the soundman will bring the music down. The quickly introduce the band and the first song and get straight into it.

Plan the set all the way through, including points when you're going to talk, and play it all the way through in order at least 3 times every practice. This way you'll always know what song is next.

Work on playing some songs back to back with no, or very little pause.

Make sure you say the band name very clearly at least three times during the set, once at the start, once in the middle and once at the end. Don't worry about mentioning the myspace/facebook everyone will already assume you're on there.

Prepare a good joke, so if you need to fill some time between songs you've got something to rely on. Talk slowly and clearly and with confidence, if you're not sure what you're saying, don't say anything!

Make sure you're enjoying yourself on stage, and work on movement. If you look bored, the audience will be! Try to get as involved as possible. Watch videos of other bands and watch what they do onstage, and try to emulate that. Practice this at rehearsals every time you play through the set. The singer especially needs to be strutting and moving a lot more, he's the focus and centre of the band and should act it.

As for getting better gigs, play every rubbish gig that comes along, but play everyone with passion and enthusiasm. Even if it's just to the same friends and family, and the other bands, if you can impress them then do it! There's no such thing as a pointless gig. Work on playing a seamless set with loads of confidence.


As for getting bigger shows in the future, make sure the boys have got that professional edge, then using your PR email address start emailing promoters and other bands. Act as though you are a booking agent, this will make the band seem more professional and will give a good impression to promoters. Find bands that are similar that are playing in the next 3 months or so and ask if they have arranged support for those bands. If there are slots available put the boys forward to play the shows.

If someone else in charge of booking, then get them to set up a new email address especially for it (but forwarded to their normal email address so they don't miss the replies) As a promoter, getting an email from joey-182@hotmail.com asking if his band can have a gig is not a good start!

If the boys are really serious about the band, get a good logo designed and have stickers made up - lots of them! then give them out and stick them everywhere! Give them to friends, and hand them out at every show, and just stick them everywhere. The band members should always have stickers on them, to stick everywhere they go, and to hand out to people they meet.

Finally, get a website and email server. This can be a total pain in the ass, but it's worth it! Using a tumblr.com blog page, you don't have to worry about designing a page, and you can have all the info you need on there. Then using Godaddy hosting, get a domain name and email address package. Having a .com really makes the band look a lot more professional, as does sending emails from that domain."