Sexism

meinhof:

The only problem i’ve had this weekend whilst playing shows with Ravachol was a bit of sexist misogyny thrown into the mix - in London when we got to the venue a pair of older guys made a couple of lewd comments to me, which is fine i guess, it happens, but when we played our set, someone actually grabbed my ass which wasn’t cool. i couldnt do anything about it as i had my back to them and was mid song and i was also a bit shocked as it was unexpected. I would like to think that it was a one off thing as i didnt think there was that sort of behavior apparent in the community of people i am involved with. Its interesting though as i read a debate about girls in music (the sort of screamo/hardcore scene i guess) recently and though there’s not as many girls as there are men, some men seem to think we are equally represented and have fair and non sexist treatment, i think it was implied that sexism phased out a few years ago, but i dont believe thats true at all. i think that it definatly exists, and the fact that i was effectively “groped” during my third show, technically our first proper show as the first two were in a private gallery and a house show respectively, is proof of things to come maybe? Does a woman have to be a tough cropped haired androgynous female to not get treated like a cow at a cattle auction? we dont need to be poked, touched or prodded. im right there, you can see me, i exist.

Girls get a hard enough time as it is, we dont garner quite as much respect as the men doing the same things, people will always ask the man i’m with a question that should have been asked to me, if a man is doing something then its “manly” and “normal”, if a girl is doing it its “cute” or “different”. If a guy is running a DIY label or promoting shows or Playing in a band then its normal, you know, but when a girl does it its twee. A girl that buys records - garnered her music taste from her boyfriend. A girl at a show - probably there to find a new boyfriend/try it on with the band. A girl in a band shirt? - belongs to her boyfriend. I know this is a bit of a blanket assumption but i think a lot of people feel like this, and a lot of girls experience this. We dont get a completley fair deal, no matter what any man tells you. For every few guys that are awesome i meet there is always going to be one that thinks as your a girl your not quite capable of whatever it is that your doing. and then every now and again a stray sexist, like the anti girls on tour brigade. HELLO!? this isnt spring break, not every girl you meet is a “slut” and its a disgusting way to think about it.

This is a subject very close to my heart and i have, for many years, hated the way girls are pitted against one another, we are made to compete with each other for attention, by the media, by society, by sheer nature of finding a mate and having the best display of feathers. its bad enough, but then add in the men that add to this difficulty of being female by keeping us just below the respect level.

There are a lot of girls in the country doing a lot of hard work behind the scenes, in front of the scenes, girls who own the keys to the venues you play at, making sure you get fed at shows, making art and music and writing, girls putting out records, promoting shows, making your merch. I hope soon men realise this and give us a bit more credit that doesnt involve groping us or telling us if we are aesthetically acceptable to them.

dont get me wrong, i love the “scene” im part of, i get to meet so may wonderful people but there a few that ruin it for me a little or are a little ignorant to what its like being a girl in it all.
My reply was too long to fit…

I agree with this somewhat, there’s definitely still sexism, not just in the alternative music scenes, but everywhere, but this is from the minority of men. There are a few girls in my area promoting shows, and they’ve earnt the respect the deserve because they put on great shows. And that’s the difference; having played crappy shows put on by both boys and girls I don’t care about the gender, just the ability to actually do what they do.

One of the biggest problems facing girls in the scene is that for each girl with decent music taste, committed to going to shows, supporting local music and all that jazz, there’s two more (at least) that are there because their boyfriend is in the band. I find it so frustrating that it’s so hard to meet a girl who’s actually getting involved and has some dedication rather than some trendy who just likes boys with tattoos.

Respect where respect is due, but it has to be earned - if your band is awesome, if your shows are packed out, if you zine is sick. Whatever you do, it’s gotta be good, else there’ll be no respect for it.

It all comes down to credibility, it’s got to be earned, male or female